Step into the daylight and let it go.

Sunday, March 31, 2013

#3.27 花又恺好了

“新的世界才学会美丽。”



Last semester did not go as well as I had hoped it would be. For starters, I was sick for more than 3 times and don't even get me started on the coughs that lasted for more than 8 weeks . I kept looking forward to a day that I would eventually get better and that day finally came after a long, patiently wait. Frankly, I felt vulnerable, devastated and ended up worrying about all sort of wrong things.

However,  the good thing was that, it suddenly dawned on me that being healthy and alive are the greatest blessings that anyone can have. It hit me that I loved my life as much as I hated it. In fact, I loved it too much to give it away. I had a lot of bitches, bullies, and people who were just plain mean without any reasons in my life. I had wasted too much of my time looking at and worrying for all the wrong things for the wrong reasons. I had also wasted a lot of time on people who're totally not worth it and worrying about what they might think.

I should smack myself 123456789 times as I totally forgot that I had you, my family and close friends who actually care in this life. Those close to me knew that I don't tend to keep people around in my life as I hated to impose myself on others. I knew it was selfish at some point but at least I wouldn't get hurt by those who were not worth the time. People who eventually stayed even after that were those who I knew that would be there for me no matter what. Sometimes I was moved by how some friends refused to leave no matter how I pushed them away. It gave me the reassurance that they wanted me to in their lives.


My smurfies. Sometimes I'm shocked by how much I depend my everything on them. =)

My cook and my failed babysitter.


Gurls who never stop caring.
My high school cray-cray friends who never stop talking about dirty stuff. 


I had seen more than enough examples where people lost their friends, loved ones and family as they grew older especially when they stepped into the society. Some even told me that there was no such thing as true friendship in this world as haters and users would eventually reveal themselves as time passed by.

But I still prefer to believe otherwise. I just hope that my life would be different than the others and would turn out right in the end. No matter what is going to happen in the future, I still have now at least, and I would hate to see it all goes to waste. It might be best to let the future me to worry about the future.  =)




Almost Home - Mariah Carey

Thursday, March 7, 2013

#3.26 Fearless

"I woke up naturally in the morning, sat on my bed with my pillows and blanket and thought of all the things, places and people that I love. "




Sometimes in life, I was just so tired of having to tolerate to suit crazy people's needs. It's an insane life to live by. I just wanted to lose myself  and go cray cray a little bit in all these-----You have this and that responsible and you have to act this and that way. You have to watch what you say. You have to care for others' feelings so you have to sacrifice so that others won't feel jealous-----stupid kind of ways of life.

I mean, what the hell was that for. Living so uptight and rightful and died in the end so that others would have a big funeral for you and commented on how great and responsible you were but in reality your life was just plain miserable to try living up to other's standards.

I was thrilled to bits that after what seemed like forever, all my girlfriends were finally back again. I couldn't thank Whatsapp and iMessage enough to keep us connected in our busy schedules. I lost count of the times people were staring because of the way we acted and talked. It was so packed and time was moving too fast for us to actually finish all the things we wanted to share with one another.




Tickled pink.
When 5 different races meet.


The best part was that there was complete honesty and trust in everything. From the superficial gossiping to all the deep stuffs and secrets, it wasn't something that normal friends would ever share. I was really glad that we still had that even though it had been a long while since we last met. It was genuine, secured and fearless to every bit. There's comfort in knowing that if I ever lose myself, you guys would be by side instead of leaving and judging.


♥ can feel the light start to tremble
Washing what you know out of sea
You can see your life out of the window, tonight...

If I lose myself tonight
It'll be by your side. 


Yes, it's indeed a luxury to wake up naturally in the morning, sit on the bed with my pillows and blanket and think of all the things, places and people that I love. And the best part of it, they love you back for who you really are. This, is a good life indeed.



If I Lose Myself --- One Republic